We Lives in His Lap

Hello blogosphere,

I'm sick sick sick of fashion week. It's been singularly unimpressive and chock full of bulging ribcages. Let's instead celebrate a certain level of Southernplayalisticadillacmuzik-liciousness as personified by Andre 3000 (or Andre Benjamin, if you insist) and his new clothing line Benjamin Bixby.

Here be the man:

Obsessed with this tiger polo combo.

in. frickin'. overalls.

Legimitised in our bloggy eyes via The Sartorialist

Here be the product:

Quote from Andre's interview in The Guardian:

"I think a lot of African-American kids don't have fathers to teach them how to dress, so you end up being taught by pictures in magazine and movies. You see cowboys, Indians, old Hollywood films, Cary Grant. It has an effect on you."

Randolph Scott & Cary Grant. Yes, I know. I know.

Fred Astaire

No offence Big Boi, but you be looking like a chump next to your bandmate. Would a little tailoring kill you? A jaunty hat?

Friends, if you have a penis, consider my advice to Big Boi as applying to your very own self. Basically, if you're not dressed as a 1930s college football star, I just don't have time for you.

'cept this guy. This guy can be in my gang.
via Facehunter.

Suit up here and here. And report back here at 0900 for your next orders.

Love,
Sgt Wigmore

Milan-o-rama: Tracksuit Strippers at Prada

Hello blogosphere,

The thing about Prada is I love Prada. Without fail it appeals to my artsy-fartsy sensibilities and love of fancy hats. I've been with Miuccia all the way: from robots to turbans to feathers to knee socks, Wigmore laps it up. All the while however, I've held the following to be true:

1) It usually takes me about three days to digest and fully 'get' a Prada collection. 2) The Spring/Summer Prada is always less awesome than Autumn/Winter Prada by a factor of least 2 and up to 11.

Even with these truths in mind, I gotta say that this is the most disappointed I've ever been with a Prada collection. Bit paratrooper-stripper for my taste. You know how in Arrested Development Gob had those pull-away 'Hot Cop' pants? Yeah. These gals could be naked n gyratin' in 0.5 seconds.

How can anyone imagine that this looks good? Bra-less pigeon ribcage and we're supposed to swoon? This ain't jolie-laide it's laide-laide-laide. If the model doesn't look good than what hope the rest of us? According to fashionologie, the models were teetering and wiping out on the shoes. Ordinarily, laughing at models tripping over is the finest sport in fashion, but the clothes make them look so weak, so fragile, I'm feeling nothing but nothing less than protective and no shiny golden dress finale in going to change that.

Yulia Kharlapanova on her way down.

Ordinarily I'd be all over this but I'm in fashion despondance.

What with this and Burberry being a super-snooze, I'm getting a little concerned about Milan.

Shoulda followed my advice and done wombats, Miuccia...though I'm still holding a glimmer for Miu Miu. Hopefully the marsupials will out.

*sigh*
Becky.

Paws and Claws

Hello blogosphere,

Well, they didn't give Kristin Chenoweth an Emmy so my entourage and I stormed out fairly early on in the ceremony. I was disappointed indeed to note the lack of monkey dresses on the Red Carpet. Hollywood needs to catch up quick-smart to my style acumen or risk looking hopelessly passe. Still: 4 good (or at least a little interesting) ones:

Christina Hendricks ("Mad Men")


America Ferrera ("Ugly Betty")


Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men)

Laura Dern

You'll notice I'm giving "Mad Men" props to two cast members. This is an example of media bias. To be honest, Christina Hendricks is the only one of all these who gives me chills and it's mostly boob-related. America Ferrera is doing vintage glam of which Wigmore also approves (plus, red lipstick, people. Live it. Love it.)

You'll see also that we've got the lovely Peggy Olsen (or to call her by her earth name - Elisabeth Moss). She's working the red lip and her own special brand of glorious frump. I'm obsessed with Hollywood jolie-laide. It's a real rarity and I love her so much for it. Laura Dern is included cuz a pockets. Love me some gown pouches and on a David Lynch lady to boot.

But p'eh. Still, you don't look at the Emmys and expect Vogue Italia. 48% less nipple for a start. If you want someone who's actually good at this stuff see Red Carpet Fashion Awards. The woman who runs that is some bizarre Yoda of catwalk and she'll analyse and critique beyond your wildest dreams.

Speaking of catwalk and a lack of monkeys, I'm noticing a curious proliferation of anamorphisation. Who'd a thought the Spring/Summer 09 would so zoo-ey?

Ob-servuhe:

BUNNIES!

Moschino Cheap & Chic

BUTTERFLIES!

Armani Prive

HORSIES!

Just Cavalli

CRICKETS!

Armani Prive

RHINOS! DINOS!



Both Christopher Kane

THE GREATER CAMOU'D PAC-MAN!

Giles

This all pleases me no end. It's funny how a horned shoe can make a person immediately lighter of heart. I just hope Prada does something with wombats. My trend spotting spidey-sense is telling me that their moment is nigh...

Look at him. In Milan, everyone travels by ten-year-old girl.

Love,
Becky.

Bloody Hell, I'm Late!

Hello blogosphere,

So much time flown. Still, I've spent a raging summer indoors and now have a Masters Degree and a distinction to show for it. Yay the Wigmore.

However, your congratulations are the chittering of pigeons and peasants to me. I have but one question to ask of you blogosphere:

WHAT THE FRICK SHALL I WEAR TO THE EMMYS?

I've left it little late what with them being on another continent, starting about now and me being in Norwich in a brown cardigan. Still, the helicopter is warming up, Rachel Zoe is making me a 'special' smoothie, I have access to style.com and important decisions have to be made. Which? which which?

Supa-tough rotting goth Spectacularrrr

by Meadham Mirchoff?

Dark hands on Dynasty side-boob by Proenza Schouler?


My armpit bleeds for no-one but you
by Modernist?


I'm blocking James Spader's view of the stage
by Christian Siriano?

Lilac simplicity with giant lion head
by Josh Goot/ Nagi Noda (RIP)?

Fuck it. We all know I'm wearing the monkey dress.

Christopher Kane, you rock my world. This dress has been all over the blogosphere but I don't care. I'm just so glad we're all on the same page. Frankly, I'll be bitterly disappointed if I wake up tomorrow to find that the Emmy red carpet ISN'T crowded with perfect hair, shiny teeth and damn dirty apes.

I don't care if you're Creationist or Richard Dawkins - it's hot and it's right now.

Anyway, goodnight, it's good to be back and gooooooooo Mad Men! Yay 30 Rock! (and nominate Battlestar Galatica next year, wouldya?)

Love,
Becky.

The world has passed me by.....

Much has happened in the blogosphere (and also the real world) whilst i've been reading kitchen sink realism and forgetting why I was ever passionate about it in the first place. As i'm on the train down to London for yet another job interview and i really need a break I was thinking about the things I might have written about if i'd spent my summer blogging instead. Here is a comprehensive list of the gems we all missed out on:-



- The tears of Callum Best could be heard the world over when Lyndsey Lohan announced she was a lesbian. Ok, so it's not fashion news, but i bet she has been wearing clothes this month and I just can't resist a bit of celebrity gossip.



- Festival fashion! Wellies versus flip flops, practical versus fabulous. Or maybe some clever combination of both. The hippy/gypsy look may flitter in and out of fashion, but it always looks good in a muddy field to me. Celebs and 'ordinaries' alike opted for seventies style headbands, denim shorts and logo tees or floating tops. With the obligatory parka or leather jacket of course. Just for you I would've reported from the front line like a queen. Like a queen!!!



- The glorious summer sales. I know the credit crunch is bad for old peoples electricity bills and homeowners, but it's a bonus if your wardrobe needs updating. The reductions this summer have been some of the biggest i've ever known, and loads of this seasons styles are easily adaptable for A/W too: everyone's a winner (unless you have a mortgage or a pile of bills I suppose!)



-L'oreal, un'real: this is the news that Loreal have faked every campaign they have run this year. First Penelope Cruz sold lash building mascara whilst wearing fake eyelashes, then Andy MacDowell and Jane Fonda had their wrinkles airbrushed and now the latest contraversy is that a computer has whitened Beyonces skin. Does it matter? Do we buy cosmetics based on their advertising? Or are we being tricked into buying products that don't work? We'll never know what I might have said!



- Kate Moss is no fashion icon. Finally the women of the world have united to confirm what i've been convinced of for a long time: being a model and wearing skinny jeans does not a fashion icon make. Miss Moss has been knocked off the most fashionable women in the world list and it's about time. Let's hope her dreary little collection for topshop quickly follows. You hear me Mr Green??

And Finally......

-Office chic. My last job was in a casual office where I plodded around in jeans and flip flops. Combine that with an extra year of student-dom and it's fair to say my wardrobe is a pretty casual (some would say scruffy affair) Which means for each job interview I have been going to, hours of wardrobe anguish have been enjoyed by all. Watch this space for a changing room photo shoot of my new office wardrobe (employment permitting)




Combine this with the pearls of fashiony wisdom that regularly fall from Beckys bloggy fingers and this could've been a good month. Ah Well. I hope you're all having a fabulous weekend.

Love Tor xxx

Ps -I promise i'll stop whineing about my dissertation soon! I'm boring myself!

PPs - This doesn't deserve a full piece of its own, but was anyone else bewildered by Gok Wan crowning 'The street styler of the year' without any of the heats taking place in our nations capital?? Bizarre!!