We've been Goked!

Hey readers,

I love Gok Wan (like the majority of the TV watching female public) But it seems that lately, where ever you go, a picture of Gok Wan is never more than a heartbeat away! The presenter of 'How to look good naked' has been popular with the ladies since the very first series of the show. But now he's everywhere! He's totally saturated the fashion market!

How to look good naked (A show I really loved 90% of the time) has been replaced with Gok's fashion fix: A show I enjoy in spite of myself and its inaccurate mission statement. I even went to New Look on Friday to look for a dress i'd seen on the show on Thursday night (sadly, I couldn't find it). What I love about Gok is that unlike Trinny and Susannah and NHJ (God I hate her, and who thought it was a good idea to contract her name?) he actually seems to like women: he makes them look good by building their confidence, not humiliating them.

But i'm beginning to wonder if Gok has gone too far. Gok has been on every single chat show, he even had the honour of presenting the Friday Night Project. You can buy underwear endorsed by Gok on simplyyours.co.uk, he has his own fashion tip section and endorses certain products for Dorothy Perkins, and I just heard on the olde telebox that this week he has been given his own column in Look magazine. All good for Goks bank balance. But is it good for us? How many of his endorsements are genuine? And how much Gok is too much Gok?

Call me cynical, but my love (and it is a genuine love) of the Gokster declined dramatically when I saw the tripe they were putting his name on in the Norwich branch of Dorothy Perkins. He let them do that! Gok is a super stylist: he knows that polyester doesn't look good on anyone. So why is his grinning face hanging to the hangers of this stuff? Dear God why?!

I'm heading out to buy my weekly Look fix this afternoon. I just hope this column avoids the "if your boyish wear this, if your curvey wear this" cliches and brings something new to the table.

Or my remaining strands of respect for the man who "brought fashion to British women" will be gone. All gone.

Love

Tor xx

Scraping up the pennies in Zara!

Hey folks,

It's that time of the year again: the summer sales! And although i'm flat broke, i'm never one to turn down a bargain. So I hit the shops determined only to spend the money I had in my purse: a twenty pound note, one pound thirty six in change and, for some reason, an american dollar. With this princely sum I wanted a dress that I could wear again and again. When the sales start i usually go crazy buying "on trend" stuff that looks great for all of a month then dissapears into my wardrobe never to be seen again. Not this year: once, just once I will listen to the advice of my mother (who I hate to admit is never wrong) and buy something durable and versitile.

For no other reason than that it's the first shop you come to when you enter the mall, I started in Zara. Here are my favourite four dresses in the zara sale, each in store for less than £20:

Apologies for the white dress/green bra combo: I really should think things through! I liked this simple linen dress on the hanger but not really on me: I had to size up so it would fit around the bust but that left it loose everywhere else: particularly note the gaping under the arms: not a good look! But I think on someone less curvy this would make a really versitile practical summertime dress you could do so much with and wear again and again.

I loved this dress!! Love love love! The fit was fantastic, the tulip cut especially flattering, I even liked the little belt they cinched the waist in with (I never normally like the belts that come with dresses) The pattern isn't what my mum would call classic but i think it is subtle enough that you could accessorise it into next year. However if I bring home another strapless tulip cut dress that I rarely wear then I think my boyfriend would hurt me (or at least tut and shake his head in disapointment) And I did buy a less superior but nontheless similar checked strapless dress less than a month ago. This one goes back to the shelf for someone else to enjoy. Sigh!

Sorry to ruin the suprise/not build up the suspense, but this is the dress I bought. I was going to look round all the shops before I decided but it fit so well and it was the only one left in my size so I had it: black is always classic, the cut fit really nicely and the cut outs and embroidered oversized flowers around the necline stopped it from looking boring. hurray!!

What would my mum say?! Ok so its not simple or classic, but I loved the pattern and the casual oversized button up thing: kind of like I borrowed a beach cover up from my nan! It looked great but the cotton was too flimsy for me: I like to feel supported by some sturdy fabric: oh dear, maybe i am my nan!

Happy shopping,

Tor x

R is for Roasting...

....As in hot hot hot!!!

According to those reliable folks at the BBC weather centre, today has been the hottest day of the year so far. And once i'd finally escaped the office that meant hours of wandering around the city centre in the sun sucking on a mint magnum and hunting for the perfect red bikini top. It seemed like the perfect way to spend a sunny afternoon. However that red top was not to be found!

A fortnight ago I went to visit my sister in southampton with my parents, and we decided to do a spot of discount outlet shopping while we were there (and why not!) Pickings were slim apart from a lovely mustard shift dress from next of all places (!?) until we went into oasis and I found these:

Because what everyone wants to see right now is grainy shots of my lumpy bum and my appalingly untidy room.....

These Odille bikini bottoms were reduced from £26 each to just £1 a pair! A bargainalicious bargain I thought to myself as I snapped them up. The tops didn't come in cupped sizes and as I can't wear a standard sized top I decided to leave them on the shelf. However with the red polka dots and the red ditsy flowers I figured a plain red top would be perfect for both bottoms and be mix and match-able for my summer holiday. But now the last laugh is on me: I can't find a "fuller bust" (I hate that phrase!) red bikini top anywhere- even my old swimwear faithful Marks and Spencers has let me down! (Although I do almost quite like this design from their new DD+ collection, which consists of only 4 designs in my size. Sigh!):

As Roy Walker would say to Mr Chips, its good but its not the one. If anyone has any ideas on where i'll find the top I crave they are gratefully recieved. Otherwise i'm throwing caution to the wind and my £2 investment down the drain and splurging on this bad boy from bravissimo that comes in at just over £50 instead:

This seasons swimwear trends of bright colours, cut outs and one pieces are not for me (too eye catching, too figure revealing, and really unflattering, in that order) but looking like a 1950s bathing beauty/potential beach goddess? That I think i'm prepared to have a go at!

Lots of love,

Tor x

Art School Fun

Hey All,

Sorry for the long post-gap: I know I whinge about it near-constantly, but i do have a job and a 20,000 word dissertation to write you know!! (In fact, I'm scribbling this down in the office as we speak!)

Anyways, as you all know I go to UEA to do an MA in reading and Becky goes to Norwich Art School to do an MA in art/writing stories and stuff. And as the Norwich Art School had there end of year degree shows this week, and Becky's interested in that kind of stuff, she and I trotted off to take a look. Here are my 3 favourite things from the students finishing their BA (Hons) Contemporary Textile Practices:

Anna Watson 'Untitled'

Jennifer Ball "Re-Made"

Carly Elia "Untitled"

And now that my boss is scowling at me, I have to go back to work!

Love, Tor x

Here come the Fashion Police....

........I always knew that there would come a time when the world would need fashion police. The very first time I saw a kappa jacket, I almost donned a trendy helmet and got to work on it myself! Well the organisers at Royal Ascot obviously saw their metaphorical Kappa Jacket at last years event, and have decided that this year will be different by enforcing a whole host of super-strict rules.

The first rule (which seems reasonable enough) is that ladies have to keep their knickers on. Who can argue with that? The Queen doesn't want to see your snatch (or at least I don't think she does...) Stewards in the Royal Enclosure will keep a closer than usual eye on ladies revealing bare bottoms should their skirts be lifted by a gust of wind... which seems like a pretty good job for any hetro male if you ask me!

Other rules determine that women have to wear formal day dress, with a hat or fascinator, while off-the-shoulder dresses, halter necks, spaghetti straps and mini skirts are all forbidden. They are even advising against the liberal application of fake tan (hallelujah!)
Men have to wear black or grey morning suits, including a waistcoat, along with a top hat.

Do these new rules make any sense? I'm just not sure that they do! But there's one way to find out: Let's examine exhibit A:

Now, believe it or not, the lady with the ashtray on her head would be allowed to attend the event. The lady in the quite pretty (but not to my taste) blue Grecian style dress and the peacock on her head wouldn't. Why? Because her dress is a halterneck. Goddamm her brazen bare shoulders! Hussy! I'm not sure I agree with the "this is the kind of shoulder strap you are allowed" facism. Some girls just don't look good in a thick strapped dress! In this case then, the rules seem a little archaic and not suitable for the fashion-conscious young lady. Lets move on to exhibit B:

And suddenly all doubt is erased from my mind! Now this, ladies and gentlemen, is the reason the new rules were put in place. Look at her in all of her glory (I know, almost all of it!) This isn't the time or the place for cheap cotton gingham. I know its warm and your British: it's been a long time since you've seen the sun and it got the better of you. But Ascot is a change to dress like Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady, not Julia Roberts at the beginning of Pretty Woman...although, of course, there is a time and a place for the Pretty Woman look (there must be!)

I love Ascot (although i've never been, maybe next year...) it's one of the few occassions left where you can be picked up by a chap in a morning suit and look truly over the top and fabulous without feeling self-concious, looking a bit silly, or spending a fortune (tickets are only £60) So although the spectacle has only just started, here are the dresses, and of course the fabulous hats, that I am busy drooling over today:

I demand a hat that looks like a jug of pimms! I've never needed anything more!

All this envy and its only the first day of the event! Imagine what i'll be like on Ladies day?! I just hope my head doesn't explode.......

Love Tor x